We were walking through Costco today...had to stock up for the month. We were getting toilet paper, whatever, I know it isn't glamorus...but I have a butt load of little girls in my house and they seem to LOVE the stuff. The paper towels were in the same aisle. My eight year old says "Oh, can we get this paper towel...it's so soft?" I looked at that child, and used the same tone my own mother did when she thought I was out of my mind..."Um...how do you know it's soft?" To which my witty eight year old replies "It just looks SO SOFT."
Marketing...damnit...marketing. It said it was SO SOFT on the packaging and my kiddo believed it. That's what marketing people do...and evangelicals (but I digress). They know that young children, around the ages of 7 and 8 are their BEST audiences. They buy into the message, no questions asked! If you can sell to the kid...you've sold to the parents.
Oh, and I will give my father credit for this one, I was happy to start in on my very long lecture about the evils of marketing and advertising. My dad was the KING of lectures and long stories. We would ask him why the sky was blue, and he would start back at the big bang theory. That meant about 4 hours of lecture until we truly found out why the sky was blue. I now use this same tactic on my children. They enjoy the experience as much as I did. BUT AGAIN, I DIGRESS!
As I looked at my little girl, and her beautiful sisters...in that moment...I began thinking about the combination of child + girl/young teen girl + advertising. At this point, some of you are beginning to roll your eyes and think, "damn feminist, here we go again..." and to that I say, "May God bless you with a daughter who gets through all that SHIT without having her self esteem affected..." and will tell you to sign off from this particular blog entry...cuz the rest of what I will be writing is just gonna piss you off more.
Here is what I saw, as a multiracial girl growing up, in the magazines:
You had to have a European-esque body and be tall, thin and white
Here is what I thought about it:
Who gives a crap?
Here is why:
Advertisers had not started their CRAZY marketing to children...so I listened to my mom and the women around me growing up...and honestly, what I saw were confident women, who valued dark skin, light skin, mixed skin, big asses, small asses, big hips, little hips, big brains, (um...they didn't really value small brains) and a great personality.
My television was limited to shows that my parents thought would increase my self esteem, and I saw very few commercials.
My own mother did not have fashion magazines, a self esteem problem, and (although she enjoyed looking very sharp and fashionable) found ways to look fashionable without buying into name brands, and NEVER PUT MUCH EMPHASIS on the topic. We talked more about reading, writing, art, theater, musicals, face painting etc etc etc etc...
NOW, I am not saying that if you value fashion, read fashion magazines, talk about fashion, prioritize fashion, clothing, and make up that you are damaging your child. I am just saying those are the REASONS WHY I FEEL I DO NOT HAVE a self esteem issue about being who I am, or with what I look like. PLUS, I stand by the fact that communities of color (especially the Black community) put far less emphasis on body type and beauty because of youth - although I will give you that light skin vs dark skin is still a huge and cruel issue in many communities of color- than WHITE communities (and let's be honest...white people are already mostly light...so maybe they just need other issues to bitch about).
Now, let's look at today:
1. Advertisers specifically market adult products in child form to CHILDREN. Barbie Make up, adult style clothing in little sizes (skinny jeans, baby bras, low cut shirts, short ass shorts). What happened to GARANIMALS people...match the red and blue striped shirt to the little pair of jeans and voila your six year old was clothed.
2. Models start at about age 12 - thanks GUESS JEANS - and are wearing stuff that NO 12 year old should be wearing...PLUS, those dang models are skinnier than a new born baby and DEAR LORD...it's gross. WHO can attain that body? Sick people, people with cancer, people who are dying because their bodies are failing? Yes, they can attain that body size...but I bet they would give anything to NOT look like that and be healthy again.
3. Reality TV and other CRAZY shows that continue to emphasize...and here is my biggest pet PEEVE, that ADULTS need to look like CHILDREN. Their hair must have the natural highlights, and can NEVER be grey. Adults must have pre pubescent bodies with tiny buds instead of boobs, and hair free vaginas (you know, those Brazilians I was talking about). Seriously, I mean I am all for the trimming of the tree...but to de-needle the tree...who has hair free wee wee's...only children before puberty. Why do adults need to look like children before puberty? I AM SO CONFUSED?????? Adults also have to have skin that glows with youth. You can't have a wrinkle on that face of yours.
SO WHY?
Women who are not of the perceived dominant Caucasian ethnic group are less valued. Let's just call this crap as it is. Women who look like woman aren't valued. Women who are older and wiser are not valued...OH WELL, maybe I could sum it up like this WOMEN are still NOT VALUED. Well, I guess we are valued if we are submisive, sexual, pre pubescent, and young beings...but watch out...cuz who wants a brilliant, strong, older, KICK ASS woman?
THE REALITY: Most people do. Most real people, outside of a very small media group, want people who are capable, smart, experienced in life, WOMANLY GROWN UP WOMEN.
So don't buy into the hype folks. Ask your partner/husband/life long mate...they will tell you the truth...don't believe the other CRAP.
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